Dear god I haven't updated my journal since 2006. That's like....uh.....three years ago. When I first joined dA I would never have expected to be here for five years but they came and went and I guess I never realized how quickly they did. I'm almost a completely different person now, less deranged/unhinged, but every so often that ghost of who I was threatens to break out of its shell, and I crack. It's kind of satisfying, surprisingly.

I'm sick. I don't like the major I thought I wanted for about 80% of my life. I discovered that I don't like working hard at physics, but that could be because I don't have the necessary background or whatever million excuses I'll dig up tomorrow to explain it away and never look back. I love writing but I don't have anything to write about. I think I always dreaded becoming "normal" or at least stable because that meant I had nothing. Now my creativity must come from within me, and it has to be strong enough for that.
I have a boyfriend and I've been in this relationship for over a year now, despite the myriad things that could go wrong (and did).

I never thought I'd miss high school this much. Or at least home. I still sleep under the same unicorn poster I did when I was eight. She smiles at me and I have to trust that she'll never fall; I do.

I do I do I do.

Not like you care, whoever you may be.